With school back in session, our children will be using the Internet to do research for projects, homework or just to unwind and play after a day at school. In some cases, this may also involve instant messaging with friends or browsing their friends' web pages on MySpace.com.

While our children may want their privacy and independence online, we need to keep a close watch on their Internet use to guard their safety. The dangers to your child on the Internet can include predators that roam chat rooms and pose as children to get your child to do something wrong or meet with them. There is also the danger of accidental exposure to pornographic images or other inappropriate materials. Finally is the potential effect of any downloads or e-mails that could contain viruses and damage your computer or allow someone to access it and retrieve your personal information.

The first step on protecting your child online is they need to know computer and Internet use is a privilege and not a right.  As such, they will not have any privacy. This can be hard for a child to understand because they desire privacy; however, they need to understand that no information is guaranteed to be private if sent over the Internet.  They should assume that any information sent can be read by someone other than the intended recipient, even their parents.

A second step would be to meet as a family and spell out rules for acceptable use of the computer and Internet. This should include not giving out personal information or pictures online and not downloading files without a parent's permission. The child should agree to report any instant message (IM), e-mail or other contact that makes them feel uncomfortable or is a request to meet with a stranger. The agreement should also include time of day to be online, the length of time and appropriate areas to visit. Passwords and user names to any e-mail, IM or website accounts should be shared with the parents and the child should show the parent the sites they use and how they are accessed. The restrictions of the agreement should also consider the age and maturity level of the child, since the rules and expectation will be different for a 5 year-old versus a teen.

A third step is to reduce the possibility that your child will be exposed to inappropriate materials online. A basic strategy is to place the computer in a central location in the home that can be easily supervised by a parent. Additionally, many major search engines allow setting of search preferences that will filter both explicit text and explicit images from any search results. PC-based software such as Net Nanny, Cyber Patrol. or Safe Eyes can be used to filter out inappropriate content.  You can also consult your Internet Service Provider (ISP) to see if they offer filtering or search for filtered ISPs on the internet. Even with all of the available technology, there is no substitute for direct parental supervision.

There are a few warning signs of potential problems with your child's Internet use. If you notice that the web browsing history and cookies have been deleted, this could be an indication that your child has been accessing inappropriate materials. If you observe that your child quickly closes a window when you enter the room, this could also be an indicator that they have been browsing inappropriate material. A final sign could be that you notice that there are password protected files or your child begins to protest your supervision of their online activities.

If you suspect problems, talk to your child as soon as possible. Their behavior may be that they want more privacy as they get older. It is natural for them to want their independence, but they need to understand that use of the computer and the Internet is a privilege. If they can't live by the rules, then they lose the privilege. It could also be that they accidentally viewed pornography or that they viewed inappropriate material because they were curious and didn't want you to know it.

The final, and most disturbing possibility, is that they are conversing with a potential predator online and this person has convinced them that you, the parent, are trying to control their life. In this case, the predator may have already influenced your child to do something shameful and wrong and is using this to manipulate your child to perform more inappropriate behavior or to meet with them. The bottom line here is that your children need to know that you love them unconditionally and that they can come to you for help is situations like this.

As parents, we need to keep our children safe from the potential harms of Internet usage. By using direct supervision and spelling out the rules of usage, we can prevent a majority of issues that would arise. For an example of a family pledge for online safety and additional online safety information, please visit www.intelligentdezigns.com.